Day ...hmmm...how many has it been?

Okay so it has been 11 days since the surgery and I can't even believe that I will have to go back to work on Monday. The 2 weeks that I had taken off for this surgery have just flown by. Not quite like I was laying on the beach in Mexico or something wonderfully tropical like that but it still has gone quickly.

Monday Mark and I drove over to Missoula. We had an appointment with the nurse to see how the progress is coming along. It is about a 10 minute visit with her and it is such a long drive and time to get there. However, we did know this when we chose our doctor so we grin and do it. In the long run it was the best choice. Something to consider when finding a plastic surgeon. There are quite a few follow up appointments that should be made and kept. Anyway, she got us in the room and I unveiled the girls. She was happy with what she saw. She said progress is coming along nicely but a little slow for the left breast. She showed us some exercises that I need to do a few times a day for a year. Basically I do it on both breasts at one time. I place the palm of my hands (one on one breast and one on the other) and press in from the outside, like I am making good cleavage, and hold it for 10-15 sec.
Then I press the opposite way from inside my cleavage with my fingertips like I am spreading them apart and hold. Then push down from the top and massage in circles for the same amount of time. On the bottom I pinch, like I am grabbing my whole boob, and push up and hold. I am guessing it all helps to put them in the area that they are eventually supposed to be on my chest and gets them to soften up. They are hard as a rock right now.

Because they are not dropping quite as fast as wanted she was going to give me a strap to put around them. This goes around my back, under my armpits and around the top of my breasts. This is left on there now basically at all times. It will help to push them down where they belong. They were out of stock on the strap so I received an ace bandage about 6-8" wide and it ends in Velcro. I don't like this near as well just because of the fact that I cannot put it on and take it off by myself. Mark has to do it every time because it goes around me twice. I did talk to one of the office gals today and she is going to order more and mail one to me.

I was told that I can start sleeping in bed now and we can move the recliner back into the living room. I was so glad about that. I was hoping that would make me a little more independent and Mark could get an undisturbed night of sleep. He was having to get up to let the lever down, on the recliner, to lower my legs. Well the bed didn't work out as planned. I laid in bed with one pillow under my head and one under my knees. I couldn't do any more under my head. It just didn't work for the back. Because of this, after 4 hours of sleeping, my whole body cramps up and I cannot get out of bed myself. I have to wake Mark up to lift me from a laying position. I can't even roll onto my side and roll out of bed. Ugh!

That was the end of our visit and the next appointment will be scheduled with the doctor one month from surgery date. UPDATE: The office called and the doctor will be in Polson for a short time this Sunday. It is about half the distance to Missoula. He has an office there that he will see patients for pre or post care. So we will take the boat out of the water early Sunday morning and head over to see him. We will be staying on the boat on Flathead lake that Saturday night. I am looking forward to seeing him since we haven't since the surgery.

As far as my mobility goes, it is getting better. I can now take a shower on my own and just barely wash my own hair. Shaving my legs is difficult but needs to be done. Funny the daily things that we take for granted. I can only lift my arms about armpit level and not really above my head yet. Reaching at this point is not allowed. I can lift a little less than a gallon of milk. I tire so easily and by the time Mark gets home from work I am a walking zombie. I am off all of my pain meds and muscle relaxers during the day but by night I am still taking the muscle relaxer. I wake up and my chest is flexing off and on by itself. It is like a charlie horse across my entire chest. Oh boy that hurts. I have been trying not to sleep by day so that I am good and tired and can sleep through the whole night. That isn't the case though. I usually wake at 4am and 6am. Which means...so does Mark. (It feels like we have a newborn in the house) Last night it was 2,4, and 6am. I am thinking maybe I will try sleeping on the couch tonight. Mark doesn't know this idea yet. If you have ever had kids, my boobs feel like they are filling up with milk. That really tight, sore, full feeling...that's it. When will they dry up...lol!
I cannot stand from a sitting position by using my arms. Can't push. My legs are getting quite the workout. And no twisting. it all pulls from the breast. Go ahead, try it. Amazing all the abuse these girls can normally handle in a day!

Well, that was a long post and I am signing off for now. I will post again after my appointment with the doctor.

Ciao!

Day 4 Post op

It is Thursday. Day 4 after surgery. I have read a lot of information about this procedure and how the recovery would progress. I feel that I am way behind in the recovery process comparatively. I figure that it is due to the cancer and radiation that was in my left breast. That is the side that is taking longer to feel better. I have a lot more mobility on my right side. Especially like the movement of my arms and the swelling in the arm pit area. I took a picture of the progress from the 2nd day post op and then today, day 4. I was pleasantly surprised how the implants are moving down and that the swelling really is going down. Funny I can't just notice that but a picture tells it all. They are now not as square looking on top. Girls had described their own post op implants as looking like Frankenstein, the square boxiness, and I could see that. Kind of a funny thought.

I am still on all of my medications and as of this point I can't even imagine backing off of them. The pain is still pretty intense and the pressure and tightness is overwhelming at times. The numbness feeling has worn off and I am getting ocassional shooting pains where the incisions are under my breasts and also in the chest between my cleavage. Someone reading this probably thinks, why would you put yourself through all of this pain and torture just for boobs. I believe that the outcome and the feeling and confidence I will regain about myself after a couple of months will definitely outweigh the pain I am having now. The left breast looks so amazing now compared to what it was. You can barely even see the incision from the lumpectomy. Mark had commented as such this morning when we looked at the progress.

I am still sleeping in the recliner with 2 king sized pillows behind me and my feet raised. I have done pretty well getting my sleep through the night. I only wake up twice during the night and it is because I have to go to the bathroom. I am drinking a lot of water throughout the day to stay good and hydrated. Mark helps me out of the chair because I cannot use the lever to lower my feet to be able to stand. He has been truly awesome. I couldn't have done this without him through the cancer and now. Both as a caregiver and an emotional ear. He is super patient with me and has a real willingness to help. That's my man! (big smile) I am a very lucky and a blessed girl. Thank you again Mark. I love you!!

At the hotel day of surgery...

We arrived at the hotel and Mark checked us inWe stayed at the C'mon Inn because they have recliners in the room. This was a suggestion from the doctors that would make sleeping a little more easy. I had to have my headed elevated for 1-2 weeks. The girls at the hotel were just coming out of our room when we were walking down the hall. They were stocking our room with more blankets, pillows and tea. They also turned on the heater as the room was a little chilly. Great staff.

Mark parked me into the recliner with pillows all tucked around me and a blanket over me and he went out to bring in all of our bags. After that he made a trip back to Wal Mart to pick up the remaining scrip and a few items to stock in the fridge. I was wanting some yogurt. When he left I fell back to sleep. Mark came back and we ate a little and I decide to check out my new additions.

I unfastened the front of the bra. They are riding very high in my chest, as expected and they are kind of square looking. They are super rock firm. All of these things are what I had read online so I was okay. I think that they look great. The indentation from the lumpectomy has been pushed out from the mass of the implant and so all that you can really see there is a straight line scar. Really no dimpling. I am so pleased with that. It is hard to tell right now about the size because they are so swollen and they will drop out of the upper chest to where they are supposed to be. After 2 months I will pretty much be able to tell my ending bra size. Until then I have to wear this sports bra day and night for 2 months. That's okay because the pressure I think would be horrible without it. The bra holds them in and close to my chest.

So Mark and I just pretty much layed around for the entire day. I had him write down all of the meds that I had and what times they were to be taken so we wouldn't lose track. There were a few. Dr. Hardy also has me taking Bromelein, a pineapple extract which reduces inflamation and Montana Arnica which reduces bruising and the bleeding to a minimum. I like that he chose these two natural things for healing. I took lots of naps, I was in and out all day. They just wanted me to rest and do nothing. So....nothing I did.

We did it!

Sunday we spent the day driving to Missoula. We were staying at a friends' house just 30 minutes west of Missoula. My appointment for surgery was at 6:15 in the morning. On the drive down we also stopped to look at a few sailboats. Getting an idea of what we want. That was a nice distraction from what was going on in our heads. We stayed up until about 10 visiting and then hit the sack for the big day.

Morning came in a hurry and I woke up to do the routine. Shower with an anti bacterial soap and wash my hair. No other products are allowed. No lotion, deoderant, perfumes, hair gel, hairspray. Nothing like that. I straightened my hair so that it would be easy for the next couple of days. Can't take a shower for 48 hours.

We got to the surgery center and the nurses checked me in. Mark was with me watching and asking questions. He was nervous I could tell because he was cracking jokes. The nurse asked me address, DOB, that kind of thing. She had me undress except for the underwear and put on a gown. She then put compression socks on my legs to keep away the blood clots. They are like a white pair of spandex knee hi's. The Dr. came in and introduced himself to Mark. Mark wasn't with me this time for pre op so he hadn't met Dr. Hardy. He started putting marks on my breasts with a black marker and wrote on each breast what size implant would be inserted. Any other questions? No, I have none...I am nervous. And I am nervous for Mark. The anasthesiologist came in and asked me a few prescription questions. What am I allergic to, narcotics and 1st generation atahistamines. The nurse set me up with an IV, no numbing stuff please it(it hurts more than the IV) which I had her put in my right arm instead of my hand. It is a lot more comfortable there, as far as IV's go. She took my blood pressure and my pulse. She then put the local anasthesia into my IV and started rolling me away and I was out like a light. I awoke in another room with a nurse by my side. I could feel my chest ached. I have read that it would feel like an elephant sitting on my chest and the pain would be unbearable, but I didn't find it to be that way. I did ask for pain meds, don't get me wrong it did hurt, but I just expected it to be a lot worse. The surgery took about an hour and a half.

Mark returned from Wal Mart. The Dr. had sent him on an errand during surgery to go and fill my prescriptions for after surgery. That is so smart...keep him busy so he is not pacing worried. One of the scrips was not available there so they were having it sent in. It would be there by noon. The doctor discussed with Mark how the procedure went. While they were in there they found no tumors or anything else that looked suspicious to think there was any more signs of cancer. That is so great!! He instructed him that I could not lift my elbows away from my body for a week. Pretend there is a band around my waist holding my arms in. I can only move from the elbows. Any lifting could cause bleeding in the breast. That would be a bad situation.

The nurse gave me some water and meds a few more times in my IV. The med that I used is Fentanyl and it only lasts for 20 minutes. It is a 100x more potent that morphine but it is short lasting. She offered me a granola bar or jello and I declined. She then sat me up slowly and I was fitted into a front fastening sports bra. I was a 36 before I went in and she put a 38 on me. I was put into a wheel chair and wheeled out to the truck and we were on our way to the hotel with the new boobs in tow!

Surgery day is coming!

My surgery has been moved up about 5 hours. I am excited about that. It was at 1:30 and I was not allowed to eat or drink until then. I would starve. Ha ha! I am now going in at 6:30 and the surgery is scheduled for 7:30. I have purchased all of the items that are needed for post op. I am supposed to sleep in a mostly upright position for 2 weeks and I cannot lift my hands away from my sides during that time.

We are staying at the Come on Inn after the surgery. They will prepare the room for us with many blankets, pillows, tea, and the room comes with a lazyboy. The following day at 9:30am I will have a post op appointment with the doctor before I go home to make sure that everything looks good. He will also give us a list of instructions for after care. I will have another appointment with him 2 weeks following this appointment.

Well the next time I write it will be done and I will let you know how it went.
I am scared and excited in one big breath.
Pray for the best. I know that I will.

Casting for Recovery

The weekend of Sept 9, 2011 I was pre selected to go on a retreat in West Glacier for Casting for recovery. See www.castingforrecovery.org It is a retreat for breast cancer survivors.They teach you the skills to fly fish and then on the last day you have a couple of hours on the river with your own individual guide assisting you. I was one of 14 women selected. It was an amazing retreat and and I met some really great women. It is so wonderful to have had this opportunity in our area. Thanks again girls!!

Mammogram and bloodwork

Yesterday I went to have my mammmogram, bilateral diagnostic, and some bloodwork. The mammograms are more painful every time I go due to the scar tissue build up. I was told by my surgeon that if I massage it daily it will not build up like that. That would have been good information to have after the lumpectomy...I'm just saying!

The results of the mammogram were favorable and the blood results got sent in.

For financial assistance with the mammogram I was covered by Save a Sister. It is a locally funded organization by donations and charitable events. There is always financial help available for those tests you just have to ask.

My pre-op appointment

So the nurse Laura called and gave us all the ins and outs of what we need to prepare for surgery. All of the vitamins I am taking can be continued, surprising for how long the list is of the items that you cannot take. I must discontinue the probiotic thought the day of the surgery. That baffles me. Your body needs that good bacteria. So I will do more research on that.

She didn't know much about the procedure itself and what was happening with the scar tissue and the scar revision on the left breast. So she had Dr. Hardy call me a couple days later with some explanation. The left breast that was radiated behaves like dead skin tissue. The skin will not be as pliable as the right. He will put an implant under the muscle. It is a silicone high profile implant that is 450cc and the right is 400cc. The problem with getting it in there neatly is separating the scar tissue away from the chest wall enough. There is also the issue that because the left brest is so tight and has lost so much mass that the left and right breast may not be in the same place (symmetrically). This means also that one nipple may be higher than another. So no different than it is now!! One way that this can be fixed is by cutting a crescent piece of skin out from underneath the nipple and stitching it back together. This is not an option that he likes to do. He feels it is just too much cutting and scarring. The other thing that surgeons will do, which is what the first Dr. was going to do that I had a consultation with, is to do fat grafting. They will take fat from another place in the body and inject it into your breast to pump up the piece that is missing. That tissue will eventually die. If I were to have it looked at in a mammogram they would see it as foreign and think that it is cancerous. They would biopsy it and find out that it is not cancerous. He says that it is just not a good ethical thing to do. That option is off the table. He said basically that when we go in he will just use his best judgment and decide then what needs to be done. I pray that he will have good judgement.

I am now 2 weeks out from surgery and I am starting to get nervous...but excited all in the same breath.

Pre Op appt.

Today I have my pre-op appointment with Dr. Hardy's nurse. We will discuss the meds and herbs I am taking now. Most of those I will have to discontinue taking to have my system clean for anesthesia and for the healing process after the surgery (bleeding and bruising). She will give me the prescriptions that I will need post surgery. I am curious as to what this will be since I am allergic to narcotics. I will also receive a 3 day scrip for something I take prior to surgery. Normally we would try on sizers to decide the size. I have already done this at another consultation I had when screening doctors. I know the size I want and I had already discussed this w Dr. Hardy at our consult. We will go over the procedure and what things I need to prepare before and after surgery. I am having the appointment in Missoula, 2 hours away, so this appointment today will be done by phone. I feel a little disconnected from it all doing it this way but it will save time and gas money.

I will post soon with the results of this appointment.

Nae